Funny Poems About Mothers

He's not the one she imagined. She imagined someone with a plan. Someone whose car didn't make that sound. Someone who called her Mrs. instead of by her first name the second time they met. But here he is. And here I am. And the look on my face is the one she's been afraid of since I was fourteen: the one that says this one is going to matter. He's not perfect. He laughs too loud. He tips too much. He has opinions about movies that are objectively wrong and he will defend them until you give up and that's how he wins. But. He remembered my favorite flower from a conversation I forgot we had. He learned my coffee order after one morning. He asked about my day and then— this is the part— he listened to the answer. I told my mother. I said: he's kind. She said: kind is good but is he reliable? I said: he drove forty minutes in the rain to bring me soup when I had a cold. She said: what kind of soup? This is the interrogation of mothers everywhere. But I see it now. The warnings were never about him. They were about how much it hurts when you love someone and they leave. She knows this because someone left her once and she's been building walls around me ever since. Mom: the walls are good. I see them. I appreciate them. But this boy brought soup.

She calls to ask about rain, whether the boiler settled, if I found the blue receipt. Never: Are you lonely? Never: Do you miss the old street? Instead: Did you eat? Instead: Take an umbrella. Love enters wearing work clothes, checks the window latch, labels the leftovers, and leaves before I can thank it.

She says the call will take five minutes. This is not a measurement. It is a genre. First comes the weather. Then a cousin I have never met. Then the correct way to store tomatoes. At minute twenty-three, she says she must let me go, adds one final important thing, and begins a second call without either of us hanging up.